Grosse Pointe Unitarian Church

What is the Welcoming Congregation Program?
The Welcoming Congregation Program is a voluntary program for congregations that wish to become more inclusive towards bisexual, gay, lesbian and transgender people. It consists of a series of workshops developed by the UUA, that church members lead throughout the course of a year.

Aren't all UU Churches Already Welcoming Congregations?
It is true that our church probably meets many of the qualifications for a Welcoming Congregation. However, official recognition as a Welcoming Congregation allows churches to be an open safe space for bisexual, gay, lesbian, and transgender persons; to take positions on oppression in our larger communities; and to accomplish outreach.

How Will Being a Welcoming Congregation Benefit Me?
Confronting prejudices in a non-judgmental, non-threatening group allows us to explore their origins and gain knowledge. Understanding our prejudices leads to spiritual growth and congregational unity.

When Did Our Program Begin?
Sunday, Feb 7th was our ‘kick-off’ day with the first introductory workshop. Subsequent workshops will usually follow the Sunday service , beginning with a light lunch Childcare will be available for all sessions. Friday night movie discussions will be interspersed with the Sunday workshops.

Do I Need to Sign Up in Advance?
Yes, we are asking that you sign up so that we make appropriate space and food arrangements. Sign-up sheets will always be found in the church foyer.

Is it necessary to attend every session/activity to participate?
Not at all. We hope that as many members as possible will participate in this program, with everyone attending at least three of the fourteen programs. A wide variety of themes and activities will be presented to keep interest and attendance high.

I’m interested. What does the actual schedule look like for the rest of the year?

• Workshop #1: “Kick-Off Service”, Introductions and Expectations - February 7th
  What we do and do not know and creating a worthwhile group climate by establishing guidelines, sharing fears, concerns, expectations, and common ground.
• Movie Night Discussion: “Anyone and Everyone” - February 26th, 6:00 pm.
  A compelling one hour PBS documentary to be screened that night. Light dinner - $8.00.
• Workshop #2: What We Know and How We Learned It - February 28th
  To understand how we have come to know and what we know about ourselves and others’ sexual orientation and gender identification.
• PFLAG Panel and Discussion Session (Workshop #9) - March 7th
  Our guests will come from PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays), Detroit Chapter. The panel will consist of parents of gay or lesbian children, an adult gay man and lesbian woman. They will be here to share and discuss personal experiences.
• Workshop #3: The Common Elements of Oppression - March 14th
  To illustrate the commonalities between various oppressions.
• Workshop #4: Gender Socialization and Homophobia - March 28th
  To understand how homophobia and hetero-sexism maintain gender-role stereotyping and limit choices for all.
• April 23 - Second Movie night; “Before Stonewall”
• May 2 - Workshop #8: “Religion & Homosexuality”
  To explore our religious beliefs for doing this work, and/or to explore how Judeo-Christian thinking has shaped our beliefs around sexual orientation.
• May 14 – Book and topical reading discussion with Jud Cole: “What the Bible Really Says About Homosexuality” by Daniel Helminiak, plus an assortment of thought-provoking articles and opinion pieces suitable for a challenging and lively discussion. Articles will be available before the event.
• May16 - Workshop #12: Transgender Identity: What it Means
  For a better understanding of transgender people.
• May22 - Movie screening & discussion – “Switch” with filmmaker Brooks Nelson
• June 6 – Workshop #6: To be announced

This calendar will be updated as specifics of upcoming programs become available.

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Clippings of Opinions in the Press

From LEONARD PITTS JR., in the Detroit Free Press, March 2010
I Am Gay

Three little words.

That’s what keeps bringing us back to this intersection of low comedy and pathos. Three words, none longer than three letters — and yet some of us still find them nearly impossible to say.

Three words: I am gay.

If he had been able to say those words, who knows what Roy Ashburn might be today? But we already know what his inability has made him: an object of ridicule.
Ashburn is a Republican state senator in California. He has always been rather reliably anti-gay in his law-making, voting against virtually every gay-friendly piece of legislation, from marriage equality to a simple motion to set aside a day in honor of Harvey Milk, a gay political icon who was assassinated in 1978.

So, naturally, we’re all shocked — shocked, I tell you, shocked! — to learn that Ashburn himself is gay. This revelation came after he was arrested for drunken driving earlier this month. Turns out he had done his drinking at a gay bar. “I am gay,” he told a conservative radio host. As for his anti-gay record? He said he was just following the wishes of the people he served.
Because who wants a leader who thinks for himself?

Then there’s Eric Massa, a now former Democratic representative from New York. He stands accused of sexual harassment by a number of his male staffers who claim he groped them. It has since come to light that he faced similar accusations two decades ago when he was in the Navy.
Massa who, according to the Washington Post, shares a town- house with several unmarried male staffers, still declines to speak the three little words, but he confirmed the latest charges in a bizarre interview with Glenn Beck on Fox News. He also tried to portray it as nonsexual. “Not only did I grope a male staffer, I tickled him until he couldn’t breathe and then four guys jumped on top of me. It was my 50th birthday.”

Oh. Well, that explains it, right? When we turn 50, all us manly men like nothing better than to jump atop one another and tickle ourselves silly. Clint Eastwood, Bruce Willis, Alan Greenspan ... all the manly men do it.

Sorry. As I said, low comedy. And pathos.

Because for all the laughter these men evoke with their lies to self and tortured rationalizations to us, I find I have also, hidden in the breath between ha and ha, a certain bitter- sweet pity. There’s just something ineffably pathetic in the inability of these middle-age men, in the Year of Our Lord 2010, post-“Will & Grace,” post-Ellen DeGeneres, post-Barney Frank, Elton John, Meredith Baxter and Neil Patrick Harris, to simply stand up and say those three simple words.
Perhaps that sounds judgmental. Perhaps it is.
But if so, it is a judgment fueled by the cowardice and mendacity of those who lack the courage to be what they are, by anger at the hypocrisy of a Roy Ashburn willing to sell out his own for 40 shekels of political approval from those who would hate him if they only knew, and, ultimately, by the realization that we have been at this intersection too many times before.

So you have to wonder: How many Massas and Ashburns, how many James Wests, Ted Haggards, Mark Foleys and Larry Craigs do we have to see, how many shocked spouses and embarrassed children do we have to endure, how many lies, alibis and justifications do we need to hear, before we accept the obvious — that gay is not a choice, gay is not a sin, gay is not a shame. Gay simply is.

And their inability to say, “I am gay,” doesn’t just speak poorly of gays and lesbians.
Because if what we see here at the intersection of low comedy and pathos indicts certain of them for cowardice and mendacity, you could argue that it indicts the rest of us for much the same thing.

After all, their inability to say what they are only reflects our inability to accept it.